I have not said, nor written, much of anything about the BP oil spill in the gulf since it began. I have been watching and reading, with a sort of horrified fascination, at what the media says is going on. I have talked to my family in the New Orleans area about it very little. I think part of me was just hoping it was going to be fixed soon, and just go away and my home town, my beloved gulf coast, the wonderful, exotic and mysterious bayous that surround the humid bowl where I spent my first 35 years, would be just fine, in no time at all. Then today I read the oil is making it’s way into Lake Pontchartrain and it all hit me like a ton of bricks. Up to this point, the damage has been happening an hour or more from “my home”. I know Port Fourchon, and Barataria Bay..I have been there and I feel the loss of that land, the culture, the jobs, the seafood…Some of my best childhood memories are of going fishing with my dad at Empire. Getting up at 4am, stopping for donuts and chocolate milk for me, hot, strong chickory laden coffee for my dad. Watching the boat launched by the electric wench, into the still waters as the sun rose. The smell of the brackish water and rotten fish was, and still is, one of my favorite smells. Takes me back to those warm, childhood memories every time. The knowledge that all of this was in danger made me sad, but didn’t freak me out. But now my lake is going to be hurt, and now I am freaked out. I have lived on both sides of Lake Pontchartain, South and North shores. I commuted over the world’s longest bridge, all 24 monotonous miles of it, for years. I fished, swam, dived, water skiid, jet skiid, tanned, loved, played and day dreamed on that lake. I drove over it, sat beside it, dangled my feet in it, fed the birds drifting on it, and smiled as the waves splashed against the slippery cement steps and up into my face. It seems my entire adult life was touched by that lake, and revolved around it at the same time. The better part of my last 10 years in Louisiana was spent living and working within a mile of the lake. It was always there, peeking between the trees or office buildings, the smell of the half-salty water in the air. Seagulls were often flying over my office and home reminding me how very close the peace and beauty of Lake Pontchartain was. My favorite italian restaurant sat nestled against the levy, right next to the Coast Guard station, and nothing beat a slow, romantic walk along the breakwater after another Two Tony’s meal, straight from the italian version of Heaven. I played in the lake as a small child, was barred from the lake for part of my adolescent years because of pollution, and celebrated the return to the water when it was healed again. I looked forward to weekend trips to Pontchartrain Beach when it was an amusement park, cried when it was torn down, bitched about the plans to turn the area into condos and attented Back to The Beach every year, a stone’s throw from where I used to stand in line for the Rajun Cajun and Zephyr. For the first time since the trauma that was Katrina, I feel lost, afraid and scared for my home, my people, my culture and my lake. MY LAKE. For the first time since Katrina I am sad that I am not there. For the first time since Katrina, I am afraid my home is changed forever and won’t be fixed again in my lifetime. I know New Orleans and the gulf region will recover from Katrina. Time and money, lots of both, will do the job. But this time…I just don’t know.
Leaving the Alamo…. Saturday, Jan 16 2010
Uncategorized 11:52 am
Most people who know me know we moved into a new house back in August. They also have either been to the house or seen pics and understand why we affectionately call it “The Alamo”. Well, the fight is over. We have made our last stand to keep the Alamo, and we are moving out.
We moved in on a handshake agreement with the owner. We have known him for years and he had always been a stand up guy, a good businessman and friend. We negotiated a price and monthly payments, which were not exactly cheap, but we felt the house was worth it. We began paying him a large monthly sum in September, for what was supposed to be an owner financing situation. We were to sign the papers first week of September. In October we paid again. Still no papers to sign. At the end of October we decided to get traditional financing, and began the process.
Big problem. The house doesn’t appraise for enough to pay his desired sale amount. And it is not off by just a little. Sorry, but I don’t routinley have an extra 6 figures laying around, so no go that way. November comes and goes. Payment made. Still no signed agreement.
Now it was December. We had paid this man enough to have paid off a quarter of the mortgage on our old house, yet we still had no signed agreement of any kind. We put an additional large chuck into paving the driveway and adding the theater room. More waiting. Still nothing signed. At this point we realized we needed to move on.
It is now January. The heater doesn’t work, yet he won’t fix it. The roof leaks, but he won’t fix it. We have been paying what amounts to tens of thousands of dollars in RENT with nothing to show for it.
So – we are done. We are moving out. We have found a beautiful home in Bel Aire, with comparable square footage and a lot of amenities. Nice neighborhood with a lot of kids, rec center and pool. We are also working with good people, sellers who are ready and able to sign a legal, binding agreement of sale, and not just take our hard earned money, and trust.
Are we sad to be leaving The Alamo? Of course. We LOVE this house, but we do not love shelling out the equivilant of my annual income in “rent” and getting no equity in return. So we are saying goodbye to Derby and our 5 acres and hello to Bel Aire and our new mauve house on 1 acre.
Naturally I will be having wine night soon to properly break in the new place and make it feel like home. Sam, Duke and Kitty will have lots of new floors, walls doors and bushes to sniff. We signed papers yesterday and are moving this week. We are not loosing any square footage, and gaining acres of pretty rose colored carpet and a new start.
So long, Alamo. I love you and will miss you. Thanks for the memories and the chance to live in a place that looked like to belonged on the beach in Malibu. It was fun while it lasted. I hope the next people who live here love you as much as I do.
From my hubs to the entire world Sunday, Jan 3 2010
Uncategorized 9:49 pm
This has been passed around between my hubs and his fellow freight locomotive engineers. I don’t know who wrote it, but everyone should read it. Be safe people!
A few pointers from your friendly neighborhood locomotive engineer:
Let’s start with some DON’Ts:
1) A train is really, really big. Can we all accept that? Not even your Ram/F-350/Hummer/douche-mobile is a match for the smallest locomotive. You say you have a Cummins diesel? Caterpillar? Detroit? */Oooooooh/*. Well I have an “EMD 567″ on a */bad/* day, and even its pathetic 2,000 horsepower will pound you and your gleaming pickup into the fourth dimension, so please, stay behind the white line!
2) I hate blocking crossings. Seriously, I feel like a complete asshole when I stop a train in the middle of the road and leave two dozen motorists to ponder their lattes and ask what the hell I’m doing. The truth is, sometimes it has to be done, so don’t honk at me, flip me off, or scream at me from the window of your Dodge Caravan as you’re shooting a U. Instead, be patient and try to believe that there’s a point to what I’m doing. It’s called “switching”, and my conductor is depending on me to work slowly and not run his ass over. If you don’t believe me, Wiki that shit.
3) Don’t climb on the equipment. I hate to sound like your mother, but you’re saving me a lot of paperwork and horrifying flashbacks by staying off the equipment. To you it might look like an abandoned train or a free ride, but when that bastard starts to move with you on it, there’s a damn good chance you won’t be able to hold on. As long as you’re on Wikipedia, punch in “slack action” and see what comes up. Also, the romance of riding freight trains is total bullshit. They’re really dark, really cold, really windy, and hobos are fucking SCARY.
4) Don’t put shit on the tracks. It’s dangerous to me and my conductor, and it’s ten times more dangerous for you and everyone else on the ground. If you’re wondering “can a train go over a rock?” the answer is YES. There’s only one problem. You probably haven’t wondered where the million shards of rock are going to go at four times the speed of sound, have you?
5) Stop whining about the horn. Countless accidents have been avoided because drivers missed the flashing lights but heard the horn. You’d have to blast Miley Cyrus and Lil’ Bow Wow pretty fucking loud to drown out a five-chime, and often that’s the only thing that saves people. Still, that’s no reason to keep your stereo at 80 decibels as you’re rolling through a crossing at sixty without looking both ways.
6) By and large, railroad cops are major douche-bags, so when you’re trespassing on railroad property, keep your head out of your ass. These guys didn’t make the cut into the real police force, and they will ream your ass inside and out to make up for their resulting inferiority complex. Also, walking on bridges and in tunnels is extremely dangerous. Ask yourself: If a train comes, where will I go? Trains are much wider than the rails they run on, so don’t be fooled.
Now for some of the DO’s:
1) If you see a large object (like a garbage can, or an F-350) that’s about to get love-tapped by a hotshot freight train, get in the clear. If the shit’s about to fly at a railroad crossing, run to the side of the street that the train is coming from. That way you’ll be behind the point of impact and you won’t have to worry about catching that beautiful pickup and its over-confident driver square on your fucking shoulders. If you run away from the train you’re just putting yourself in the line of fire, and the death toll could very possibly be two.
2) If the gates stay down and the lights stay flashing, stay where you are. I guaran-damn-tee there’s another train coming, and speeding onto the tracks the moment the first train clears is a lot like celebrating a touchdown too early. WHAM.
3) When you’re waiting for a train to pass, it’s a good idea to stay back thirty or forty feet. Trains are operated by professionals, but often they’re /*loaded*/ by total assclowns. I’ve heard some real nasty stories about payloads falling off flatcars and crushing people in their vehicles, or doors sliding off boxcars and ripping through everything in their path. It’s rare, but shit happens!
4) Always report problems or suspicious activity. If you see a photographer with a radio scanner and a big-ass notebook, ignore him. We know those guys.* But if there’s a dude in street clothes working a crowbar through a signal box, hit us up and tell us what the deal is. Railroad crossings usually have signs with emergency numbers, or you can call the non-emergency number for your local fuzz. If an accident has already occurred or a life is at risk, call 911 instead. Pretty sure they have our number.
5) Last but not least, when you’re inconvenienced by a train, remember that we’re pulling for you! Trains are a great way to conserve fuel, reduce greenhouse gas emissions, and keep American jobs alive and green. Rail technology is the best solution to our energy crisis, and as the rail network grows in the years to come, it’s important for everyone to stay safe. Look, listen, LIVE.
Welcome 2010. I cannot begin to imagine what you will bring… Thursday, Dec 31 2009
Uncategorized 5:19 pm
I have been reading a lot of lists and tweets and face book postings and blogs…you name it, about the last ten years as seen through many different sets of eyes, ears and perspectives. I have honestly not paid too much attention to what my life has been over the last 10 years, until today. No real reason, just didn’t really care enough to look back. Then the “#10years” tweets started and I stopped for a minute to think back to where I was 10 years ago today. Dec 31, 1999. I almost fell out of my chair when that hit me and then the memories started rolling in and now I can’t stop them. Despite the fact my children were born in 1997 and 1998, the first 10 years of the 2000′s can lay claim to bringing the biggest changes to my life.
Dec 31st, 1999 I was living in a half renovated double-wide trailer on 2 acres in Ponchatoula, La. I had been married for 7 years and had 2 babies almost 3 and 2 years old. We had no heat, just kerosene heaters which did not work well. No oven or stove, just a microwave. My (now ex) husband was making great money, in the neighborhood of $70,000 a year working in a refinery, but it turns out he was supporting his ‘ho and with what was left he went hunting and spent on himself and his beloved farm animals. I remember getting $100 a week to feed all 4 of us, with one in diapers and no oven or stove to prepare good, cheap meals. I was living a nightmare. This was probably the lowest point in my life.
Two months later he left/I kicked him out, and the kids and I moved in with my parents. I got a job and a life and slowly climbed out of one hell and into another. Being a single mom was no fun for me. I am not built to be alone and spent most of the first 5 years of the decade struggling, lonely and overwhelmed. In 2002 I got pregnant by a guy I barely knew, got married and lost the baby a month later. 2 years after that I kicked him out and finally found myself in a place I could almost be happy on my own. I was still over whelmed, still dead broke, but fortunately also still had the support of the best mom and friends a girl could ask for. We were making it by the end of 2004. Not thriving, but making it. The kids were in “big school”, I had a reliable job and paycheck and vehicle.
2005 issued in the “Year of Change” as I think of it. I met Chuck in January, he got transferred away in June, Katrina hit in August and we blew into Wichita, KS in early September. We went from a camper to a home in 2 weeks. By the end of October I had a job where I am still employed, making double my last salary in La. Fast forward 2006 through 2009. We worked, played and explored our new world. We grew to love then hate then finally became accustomed to the snow, and learned to appreciate the low humidity and constant Kansas wind. The kids made tons of friends, and our house is always filled with family and friends and the barks, meows, squawks and sqeaks of our pets. 4 months ago we bought our dream house. The kids are now both home schooled and thriving. And the most imporant part of all…
We finally found happy.
I look in the mirror and I see more than the 30 year old girl now turned 40. I see more than the few wrinkles and grey hair and, um yes, some weight gain. Beyond all that I see the woman I was meant to be. I have a double-major degree. A successful career that is about to start moving forward again. I see someone who has learned to love herself and teach her children to do the same. I see a woman who now knows what it is to love and be loved by a man with no strings attached, just for who you are. I see a smile, even on the tough days. And yes there are still some of those, but they are a different kind of tough. The kind where there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I can handle that kind of tough any day.
Looking back at all the changes in the last 10 years I cannot even being to comprehend what the next 365 days will bring me, much less the next 10 years. If it keeps getting better at the same rate, I will be pinching myself daily to be sure I am not dreaming on my 50th birthday. Sure my life isn’t perfect, who’s is? But if nothing else I have learned that life is going to put me where I am meant to be, and I am strong enough to take anything it throws at me.
Bring it on!
Happy New Year.
When Ex’s Invade Wednesday, Jun 24 2009
Uncategorized 11:33 am
The biological father of my children and I separated in 2000 and divorced in 2002. He was always a pretty much absentee dad and husband, too busy with his own life to be around for us. He got his new girlfriend and his freedom and the kids and I went on to make a batter life. Fast-forward 9 years to today. He hardly ever calls, never did send the promised Christmas presents and is late with a call/card/present for their birthdays every year.
Our first summer in Kansas I let them go visit him for 3 weeks. It was a disaster. My son was mentally screwed up for months after that.
Summer # 2 we kept them home. Kids got older. more mature, everyone was happy.
Summer # 3 I let them go visit him for 5 weeks. it worked out ok, but became a huge hassle and expense for me, getting the kids there and back.
This is summer # 4 and I kept the kids home again. Partly because 1) They wanted to stay home and 2) my son is being home schooled and chose to work over the summer and get through 5th grade so he can start 6th in the fall, and 3) my daughter barely passed 6th grade math so she is retaking it over the summer via home school products to prepare her for 7th grade middle school at Truesdell.
Seeing as how he has not paid a cent in child support since Katrina, the Ex knows he can’t pitch much of a fit over my not sending the kids, and I extended the invitation, as I always do, for him to come here and see them. It seems this year he is taking me up on it and I am not happy about it.
First his parents are coming into town this weekend. They are on the road from Mississippi as we speak. I don’t have any real problem with them except that they are retired and well-off and have never bothered to come see the kids before now and have NEVER helped me out as a single mom struggling to take care of their grandkids. Not even to baby sit. Nothing, nada, zilch. So I am annoyed with them but I am making sure it all works out – for the kids. This time.
Now their bio-dad wants to come see them in August for a few days. I am glad for the kids, but supremely ticked (ok pissed) at his behavior over the last 4 years and as a result I am feeling very resentful of him and his parents. My hubby is even more livid but is staying out of it and just asked that I keep them all clear of our home and life. Let them visit, take the kids to their hotel for a few days and go the hell away afterwards.
Maybe I am being petty and selfish but I don’t feel like any of these people deserve to spend any time with my kids. I have raised them without their help and they are amazing human beings. None of these people know my kids at all, have no idea of their likes, dislikes or personalities. On one hand I can’t wait to gloat when they see how incredible the kids have become, WITHOUT their help, but on the other hand I want to yell FUCK YOU and refuse to let them ever see the kids again.
So today I am feeling a bit psycho over it all.
Craigslist – dry like the desert… Tuesday, Jun 23 2009
Uncategorized 4:29 pm
Well it seems my great idea of blogging all of the King’s finds has kind of dried up, along with the great finds on craigslist. We did score one more thing last week. A gas stove for my Mother-In-Law for $25. It’s really nice and she is thrilled to be “cookin with gas.” Since then though – Nada. Zilch. Zip.
Now thats not to see the King hasn’t tried. He went to look at a travel trailer for $250 last week too, but it wasn’t worth the dirt it was sitting on. He also found a great deal — lots of free sand. We like free. and we need sand for out backyard renovation. The problem was trying to figure out how and when to move a 20′ x 40′ x 6″ deep area of sand 1) by himself and 2) with no equipment larger than a shovel and wheel barrel. We discussed it at length, and decided no sand, no matter how free, was worth that kind of work. If we could have brought in a backhoe or something we would have been all over it, but the homeowner said shovel and wheel barrel. So someone else is having the pleasure of shoveling 5 dumptruck loads of sand one scoop at a time. Good for them. The deal of the day? Absolutely. The deal for us? Nope, not this time.
My fingers are crossed the King gets back into the swing and comes up with more free fun stuff soon, but it the meantime. The search continues…long live the King!
Criagslist Score of the Day Tuesday, Jun 9 2009
Uncategorized 11:44 am
Well, it is only 11am and the King of craigslist has done it again. This morning’s acquisitions are:
1) A pool table, complete with balls and sticks. For free. In great shape. I have no idea where we are going to put it, but I grew up with one and I love the idea of having one again and spending time with the kids teaching them and playing with them.
2) Plastic lockers. My son boxes and has wanted some lockers for his bedroom to keep his equipment in for some time. He specifically wanted some plastic ones he saw online. Well the King found the exact lockers, for free, on craigslist today. The bonus? They come full of board games.
The King has done it again. I love that man.
Craigslist Conquests Monday, Jun 8 2009
Uncategorized 12:19 pm
Anyone who knows me knows my hubby is the King of craigslist.com. He cannot go more than a few hours without stopping to check and find the “Deal of The Day” Sometimes he misses it, or the best deal is for something we cannot remotely find a use for or a place to store it until we have a use for it. Sometimes he scores. And um, no I am not referring to the infamous Personals Ads, when I say he scored. lol Needless to say, hubby likes to shop.
He likes to shop everywhere and anywhere, all of the time. And anyone who knows me also knows I am not a shopper, so it all works out just fine. Except for one thing. Ok, maybe more like the 20,000 things we now own that used to be on craigslist. Am I exagerating? Ok maybe a bit, but not by much. The 8000+ bricks that are making their way around my yard as various patios, walkways etc., can attest to the truth of that statement. Now there have been a few craigslist finds that I adore; Like the hot tub, pool heaters, gas grill and the big coca-cola cooler that is the best refrigerator I have ever had. The stories and acquisitions are almost endless and hard to keep track of, so I decided to start a craigslist “Find of the Day” blog to keep up with it all.
Entry # 1 – Today June 8, 2009. Scored with a free swing set for the grandbabies. Metal, from Sears, still pretty new and in great shape. Hubby picked it up and got it installed and the kids love it. And did I mention it was free? Good day for craigslist and the King is in his element, And it is only noon so who knows what else we might acquire before bed time?…
How to fix the mortgage crisis Saturday, Jun 6 2009
Uncategorized 12:03 pm
Ok, I am no brain surgeon, but I have been in finance and accounting for over 20 years, so I have pretty good instinct when it comes to money. I doubt my humble mind could grasp the size and extent of the dollars involved in the mortgage crisis this country is currently going through, I mean, who can really imagine what hundreds of billions of dollars really is…but I digress. The way I see it there are two major issues facing homeowners and banks right now. 1) Adjustable rate mortagages that went way up and homeowners can no longer afford the payments and 2) Unemployment that has reduced or completely eliminated a homeowners ability to pay their mortgage. Here is my fix. The US government has to immediately REQUIRE all US banks that handle mortgages to refinance everyone in the US at 100% of current loan balance and at a 3-5% interest rate. For free. Homeowners who have reduced income due to job loss should get the lower rates and homeowners who are employed should get the higher rate, which is still lower than pretty much anyone could get now.
Now don’t say those interest rates are too low and the banks can’t survive on that. That is total bullshit. If the rates are low enough that people can afford their payments, then there is no defaulting, no bankruptcies and the steady stream of income from everyone keeping their homes will provide more income then higher rate mortages that force people to loose their homes. A guaranteed smaller amount of income is healthier long term than higher income that results in higher rates of default. Common sense mixed with some consideration for the hard working people in our country who are struggling, most through no fault of their own.
I admit when the mortgage crisis first started I had little sympathy for the people affected. I mean who is their right mind would give a loan for a $250,000 house to a single mom who makes $12 an hour? What kind of idiot came up with that idea? Did anyone really think an uneducated waitress is ever going to be able to afford the notes on that house once it is no longer interest only? Give me a break. I really did not feel sorry for people who signed into those kinds of loans because they bit off more than they could chew and now have to pay the price. Should those loans be legal? No. But were those homeoweners resposible for their own messes? Yes. Well, then along came the economic crash and the layoffs and there went my self rightousness and indignation. Now people everywhere are loosing everything and they cant do anything to fix it. NOW it is time for the government to step in and fix it for them. For all of us.
We could be next and if either of us lost our jobs we could not live the way we do now on one income. We would loose the cars for sure, though probably be able to keep the house if we gave up the car notes and cell phones and other luxuries. However, if the government required all banks to refinance all mortgages, not just the ones in repo now, then everyone would have a better chance of surviving this recession, and as the economy continues to struggle and more people loose their jobs, the more likely people will still be able to live in their homes, feed their children and be viable parts of the community.
Come on, you cant tell me one of the financial geniouses in DC has not thought of this. So do it, MAKE the damn banks cooperate. Dont make it voluntary like now. None of them are giving out loans with all those billions of dollars they got from the government. They are just sitting on it -which is wrong and needs to be stopped. Force them to comply or remove their licenses to issue mortgages, car loans etc.
My idea could work for auto loans too and help keep the auto companies in business. All car loans should get a flat rate of, say 9% at the highest for anyone who is employed and makes enough to cover the payment. Fuck the credit bureaus and credit scores. They mean nothing nowadays. They are just an excuse for banks to rip off customers with super high interest rates because they didnt pay a $200 medical bill 5 years ago. Credit scores should be limited to reporting 1) Actively open revolving accounts and 2) Bills incurred within the last 12 months. Thats it. Just because I didnt pay a bill 4 years ago doesn’t make me a dead beat. It doesn’t mean I will be late on a car note and doesn’t mean I won’t pay my house note. I don’t think credit should have ANYTHING to do with refinancing of home or getting car loans right now. It should be income vs affordable payment and the lowest interest rate possible.
Keep people in their homes. Let them buy cars and keep Americans working. Get the economy working and money flowing and make the banks step up and take resposibility for the mess they created out of greediness. They can take a hit on their huge profits for a few years to get the country back in it’s feet. And don’t even get me started on credit cards. Grrr. Ok, theres my idea. Mr. President, you can fix this mess and it is really this easy. So do it. Thank you.
MySpace for tweens? Monday, Apr 6 2009
Uncategorized 11:31 am
At the risk of being the meanest mom ever, I have refused to set MySpace pages up for my kids. Yes, I have a MySpace page, and a Facebook page and Twitter and this blog – so I have no inherent predjudices against so called social networking. I do have a problem with 10, 11 and 12 yr old kids using internet media that is not age appropriate. Maybe that makes me old fashoned or mean or just not with it, but the kids safety is what is important to me more so than their popularity. Is that wrong?
I remember my parents not letting me do certain things at certain ages that all my friends did. I remember being so mad at them and feeling like my social life would be ruined forever. In retrospect I survived childhood and adolescence anyway…but do I want to put my kids through the same thing?
Our reasons 1) MySpace itself says if you are under 15 you cannot have a page. By allowing a 12 yr old on MySpace, I am telling them it is ok to lie to get what you want. That is not ok with me. 2) There are legitimate safety reasons MySpace and other sites have age limitations. I don’t want to put my kids at any more risk then necessary, so why would I second guess the rules that are in place for their safety to begin with? 3) Kids spend enough time watching tv and playing video games and the internet and at this age they dont need any more excuses to sit around and get fat. We already limit tv and videogames in my house; The kids arent allowed either until after 6pm – and that is every day including weekends. As a result my kids are outside playing with friends, riding bikes, throwing snowballs, reading books, drawing pictures – all things that give them so much more from life then getting lost in the boob tube so why give them one more thing to keep them in a chair instead of being active? 4) There are other internet based things the kids can do that give them experience with computers on the net that are safer, more fun and more easily monitored by parents. Both kids have email accounts and are allowed on certain kid related websites where they can play games, and network with their peers on a limited basis. I have also promised to set them each up with their own blog where they can post thoughts, pictures and other info they want to share with their friends but that doesn’t have the risk factor of MySpace.
I think that is enough for a 11 and 12 year old and the kids are ok with it too, pretty much. They want their own MySpace pages but they aren’t whining about it, too loudly, yet. Am I being too strict on this? Am I limiting them too much? I honestly feel like we are doing the right thing but wow it is hard knowing what the right thing is sometimes. I guess for now I will just live with the whining and tell them to send an email and be happy. Or write a blog. Or get the hell outside and enjoy being a kid. One day in the not to distant future they will wish they could do anything BUT stare at a computer all day. Sound familiar?
